I am done with blogdrive for awhile. I am now under the influence of Greatest Journal. You can check out my Greatest Journal here; _AndLoveSaidNo_.

Emily is here, and what a surprise, not for me. She's with, yeah, you guessed it, Mandie. And Brooke is here, and so is Lauren and Amy. I'm the only one dressed in black who's not on a bike inside. And I'm proud to be that one. I'm probably going to take my second shower today. People call me a neat freak because I take two showers a day. But that's only because I feel like a nut sack during the day. I get all hot and sweaty and I feel gross, I need to wash away that feeling. I love my new braclets.

Well, I finally got it. John said I love you for the first time. And I wasn't there to say I love you too. But he still said it. I'm feeling much better about our relationship now. Everything is going so much better than the first time. No cheating, no fights, and no hiding things from eachother. I love him, and I am at my happiest. I went shopping yesterday. I got some skirts, a shirt, a jacket, and some underwear. We have established that Tory and Jake do not get along. Tory thinks Jake's fat, and Jake think's Tory is ugly. Jake said he would pay for the surgery for Tory just as long as he doesn't have to look at her. That's pretty mean. But I am staying out of it. Aimee's surprise party was friday. I couldn't post it because she would find out. Tory and I went swimming in her pool in our gym uniforms, then we got out and got ready for the party. We ran to Aimee's house, and we ran in. We sat on the couch for a little with, Monica, Justin, Miles, Garth, Steven, and some other girl I didn't know. Alaura had called a little while ago saying her and Aimee were on their way. So we tried to hide, but we ended up going behind the house. When Aimee and Alaura, and about 7 other people pulled up, we walked out front. They had a blindfold over Aimee's eyes, and they wouldn't tell her where she was. Then Alaura took it off and we all yelled "Surprise!!" and Aimee screamed. And we all sort of hung out for the rest of the time after that. Aimee was pretty happy Seth was there, and we tried to get Seth to kiss Aimee, but he said he didn't want to infront of everyone. I think he's just a pussy. But don't worry, we will get him to kiss her some time. I think I should make a new layout for this thing. I don't really like the one I have now. I want to try somthing different. I also want to make a new profile. I'm starting to get bored with Ville Valo being everywhere. John makes fun of me because of how much I love Ville Valo. But oh well.

Dude, I hate some people. I was kissing John today, and Jake pushed him into me, and I bit John's tongue. I felt bad. It's so fucking hot in this house. I can't go to Laura's party, but oh well, I get to go shopping. I need some sleeeeep.

Well, I don't feel like updating, so here are some pictures I found on google that I liked.

Yes, Debbie and my father are gone for the week. This is so great. My grandmother will be staying with us, yes, but she won't bother us. She only cares about Zane. My grandparents for my father's side are here now. This morning at about 5:17 I woke up and Dickie, Donna, my Grandmother, and Grandfather were in the kitchen waiting for Debbie. I can tell this week will be good. I'm wearing my striped skirt, and my Nirvana tank-top. My Grandmother was asking me if I was aloud to wear it to school. It was funny. I'm really hungry, Debbie let us skip dinner and we all got icecream. I think she felt bad about not taking us to Hershey Park. But I'm glad we didn't go. I hate Hershey Park. I need to find some new perfume. Emily thinks Rag Doll smells good, I think it smells like shit. I like the Lola Goth stuff. Right now I'm using Tommy Girl, which is okay, but I would rather have somthing else. Ahh, I hope I see John today. I guess Laura is giving out invitations to her party today, and I wouldn't be heart broken if I didn't get invited, but I probably did.

Well, my day started off a little bad, then everything started going good. I don't really feel like telling you everything that happened that was good, but I got to see John this afternoon. His hair looks great short. He looks so hott. And I was walking to my bus, and I got a kiss. Just a regular kiss, but I was still happy. I have to admit, I was thinking about him all afternoon. And, all weekend. It was crazy, because everytime it got quiet between Jocelyn and I, she would always say, "Stop thinking about him!" And I know she's right about me thinking, but I wasn't about to stop. I realized how happy I was today, but yesterday was not good, not good at all. That night I realized somthing, I realized that I had to spend Mothers Day alone, because of course as lots of you know, I have no mother. And I cried for about an hour last night. But I'm fine now. Amber has been cutting herself again because of 'Mouse'. I hate that, she cuts herself for no reason. Ohh boo hoo snot and tears, Mouse broke up with me, I think I'll slit my wrist one last time. Debbie and my dad are leaving for Myrtle Beach tommorrow morning at 5. Tonight my grandmother is comming to stay with us. So the whole week the parents won't be home. John said he might come over one day this week, and I hope he does. I want to see him again. Emily seemed to have layed off Eric's girlfriend Jessi. She hasn't said eww she's fucking ugly or anything else like that. Brooke and I are friends now, because I talked to her. Brooke's really nice though, the only reason I didn't like her is because John told me she said some things about me, but whatever.

Well, as you can see, I'm back home. I've been home alone for about, 6 hours now. I talked to John alot today, and all of it was great. I'm looking at icons now, awaiting John's call. Debbie and Mandie and Zack went to Zack's lacrosse game, they left at 12. It's 8:36 now. I wonder if they died..

Well, now that my birthday has ended there is no reason for all the hugs from people. Last night Mandie, Tory, Emily, and Tina got Jocelyn and I. Mandie only put lotion on my face, but I feel terrible for Jocelyn, they put, salt, pepper, pepsi, lotion, ketchup, and lipstick on her. When I went to Hot Topic I got, a dress, a Kurt Cobain shirt, and a Blondie shirt. I got a new pair of zipper earings. When we went to the mall, I flashed Tor my underwear, and some teenager drove by and said, "Shake that ass baby!!". It was so hot in my room last night, and now it's freezing. Jake told me John called me a whore, and I asked John, and he started flipping out and saying "No, I really like her why would I say that?" But I don't know who I believe. John has a history of calling me a whore before. Ohhhh and I got the HIM greatest hits cd. It came with a poster :-). I hate it when at sleep overs, whenever they do things to people in their sleep, when the person wakes up angry, everyone denys everything. "Oh I didn't do it, I was on the computer or somthing." Stupid ass excuses. Tory and I are going to Jocelyn's today. And I'm not sure if Emily's going home, or to Brooke's. Erinn is the only one on, so I figured I would update. Gahh, it's so cold in my room!

My birthday is tommorrow gangsters!